really, it's not that impressive

This blog solely exists because one night (tonight) I felt particularly pathetic and thought it might be cathartic (probably not) to purge over the internet.

What's the problem? No motivation. I mean NONE.

Why? No direction.

I keep thinking over last year. I knew exactly where I was going and was taking every feasible measure to get there. I'm perpetually turning that person over in my mind--she was great, wasn't she?

No. I don't think so. I think her priorities were skewed. VERY skewed. In any event, I admire her tenacity. I liken it to a drug...if I could only get a little bit of that!

My job. My job is making me good money. This is funny, considering nobody actually allows me to fulfill my hired purpose there. I don't like that.

School. School is kicking my ass. Most likely because, now that I'm in the working world as well, I realize PR probably isn't what I want to do with the rest of my life. Thus, spending 12 out of my 16 hours of school in PR classes seems pointless.

What do I want to do? Hmm. Well, I keep thinking about getting a masters in journalism. A PR and Journalism background is dy-na-mite. I have a couple freelance writing gigs--this is a start, yes?

No no no. What do I really want to do? Own a bookstore. Get a few rejection letters from The New Yorker.

I blame my father's side of the family for this crisis (not really..ok, really). They taught me how to work work work at absolutely EVERYTHING until I was blue in the face. Then, they'd tell me I looked GOOD with a BLUE FACE.

That's a fucking lie. No one looks good with a blue face. They just look like an asshole. And if they're a really BIG asshole, they look like that Violet girl from Willy Wonka who ate the gum she wasn't supposed to eat and morphed into a giant fucking blueberry.

How long was I walking around looking like a giant fucking blueberry?!?!? And what were my friends doing during all of this? Don't you think a person has an obligation to tell someone if they look like a giant fucking blueberry?? Don't you!?!?